Judging Others ... Judging Yourself

Have you ever noticed how many people are inconsiderate? How often others just don't seem to be aware of anyone but themselves?

How about the people that think they are worth more than others because their bank account is bigger? Or those that think their opinion is better than others' because they are well-known celebrities, politicians, public figures, or hold a post of some weight?

And have you seen any of those that believe there is something special about them because they frequent a lot of social events, or because they eat at certain exclusive restaurants, or stay at up-market hotels?

What about the person who drinks too much and creates havoc on public roads? Or causes uncomfortable situations in a family's holiday reunion? The list could go on and on.

Judging other people for any of the above and many other things, is a curious phenomenon. As we judge others we are actually judging ourselves. What I mean by that is that if we feel we must judge, we automatically place ourselves in a position of "better" in some way than the other person. Examine that for a moment. Better? Better?

It may be true that others do whatever they do, but where do we come, what place in ourselves to we come from with these judgements?

Much negativity is associated with judging others, beginning with that essence of feeling somehow better or more worthy, or holier, or less materialistic, or more law-abiding, or less vain, etc. than another. So in this comparison of ourselves and the other, we lose any possibility of connection with the other. If we lose that, we lose the most precious aspect of our time here: that of discovering our connection to all of humanity.

Going back to judgement - here is a suggestion: when you find yourself judging, and if you would like to do so less, or stop it all together, simply send the other person peace or love in your mind, and let it go. Let whatever it was that you had been judging leave your mind. You will find that your life becomes both much more simple, and much, much richer. Try it, even if only for a couple of weeks to observe its effect on you.

 

Books by Dr. Gabriella Kortsch:

Rewiring the Soul

Click here to download the first chapter.

To see the Table of Contents click here

Reviews From the Back Cover:

"The masterwork of a profoundly gifted healer of the soul. Dazzling, challenging, wondrously useful." Peggy Rubin, Director, Center for Sacred Theatre, Ashland, Oregon; author: To Be and How To Be, Transforming Your Life Through Sacred Theatre

"Rewiring the Soul is one the best introductions to the spiritual life I've ever read. Not esoteric but real-world & practical. The implications are profound." Peter Shepherd; Founder Trans4mind.com; author: Daring To Be Yourself 

"The human being's directory to the soul. A breakthrough for those seeking practical assistance, those of a more mystical bent & every soul awaiting discovery." Toni Petrinovich, Ph.D.; author: The Call: Awakening the Angelic Human

The Tao of Spiritual Partnership

To download the first chapter, click here
To see the Table of Contents click here

Praise for The Tao of Spiritual Partnership

“All humans seek the illusive touch of another's Soul, which opens us to the sense of belonging to something bigger than the self. Dr. Kortsch has given us the true "tao" of relationship in this brilliant exploration of emotional tapestry. We will be grateful for this illumination of spiritual partnership for generations to come."
Chris Griscom: Spiritual Leader, Author (among others) of: Ecstasy is a New Frequency

“Eloquently and comprehensive, showing how your primary love relationship may be a sacred vessel that transports you and your partner to a place of mutual healing and expansion.” 
Robert Schwartz: Author of Your Soul’s Gift: The Healing Power of the Life You Planned Before You Were Born 


The Power of Your Heart: Loving the Self 

My new book: The Power of Your Heart: Loving the Self, is just out. Here is a brief excerpt from the Introduction:

It is your right to live a life of love. It is your right to understand that loving yourself first is not a selfish way of behavior, but one that allows you to live that life of love. However, it's highly probable that you never got the instruction manual explaining exactly how to accomplish this. Possibly your family - and it may have been a loving family - considered loving the self an act of selfishness. Or perhaps the members of your family simply didn't practice loving the self, and of course, what you didn't see - what was not shown to you - while you were growing up, meant that you just didn't learn how to apply it to yourself. The closer you are able to move towards loving yourself, the closer you will be to living a life of love - quite independently of whether you are in a love relationship or not. A life of love can be lived with or without a partnership, because a life of love implies that you know that it all begins with you by loving the self. The more clearly you understand how to love yourself, the more clearly you will see that it is very hard - if not impossible - to love others in ways that are unrelated to fulfilling any of your needs. Loving yourself first is - for so many of us - one of the hardest things we will ever learn how to do. But know this: the benefits affect you in every particle of your being - body, mind, and soul - and are greater than you will ever be able to imagine.

Our Connection to Others

Listening to a Wayne Dyer talk recently, I was reminded of a book by Carl Gustav Jung that I read for the first time in my 20's, called Modern Man in Search of a Soul. Books such as this one give continually greater meaning on subsequent readings, because of the changes in yourself that allow you to understand the author's intent on other - higher - levels.

The concept of cycles or ever-higher spiraling stages in a lifetime has been examined by many disciplines, and is well worth a look.

In his book, Jung refers to different archetypes, or times in our lives, which Dyer paraphrases as follows (and there is a connection, of course, to Abraham Maslow's concept of hierarchy of needs here as well):

• Athlete: our primary emphasis is on our body, what it can do, how strong it is, how good it looks
• Warrior: at this time in our adult life we try to conquer, defeat, collect, win, set goals, get as much as we possibly can, our primary emphasis is on getting ahead, on accumulating, on achieving some sense of security
• Statesman: now we no longer ask what's in it for me, but instead, shift to how may I serve? because that simply becomes more important for us...the emphasis is no longer on the I, but rather, on the you. (Note: this generally does not work well, until the person has a healthy love relationship and connection with him or herself...see also my May 2007 Newsletter: Tending Your Inner Garden)
• Spirit: we begin to understand that this is not our home, and that these are not our bodies, and that none of this is real.

In the understanding of this, you begin to see yourself as the witness to your life, and you can let go of the ego (the part of you that says I am what I have, what I do, and what others think of me. It also says I am separate from you, rather than connected to you and that what I have is separate from you...there is a great deal of interesting material about the ego in A Course in Miracles).

Letting go of the ego offers enormous inner freedom, it offers a real possibility of living in the now (see also Eckhart Tolle's The Power of Now), and finally, it offers the possibility of allowing us to see that we are truly all one, and that we are all connected. This higher consciousness, or mystical awareness allows you to see the connection that is there among all of us.

Click here for others posts on our connectedness.
 

Books by Dr. Gabriella Kortsch:

Rewiring the Soul

Click here to download the first chapter.

To see the Table of Contents click here

Reviews From the Back Cover:

"The masterwork of a profoundly gifted healer of the soul. Dazzling, challenging, wondrously useful." Peggy Rubin, Director, Center for Sacred Theatre, Ashland, Oregon; author: To Be and How To Be, Transforming Your Life Through Sacred Theatre

"Rewiring the Soul is one the best introductions to the spiritual life I've ever read. Not esoteric but real-world & practical. The implications are profound." Peter Shepherd; Founder Trans4mind.com; author: Daring To Be Yourself 

"The human being's directory to the soul. A breakthrough for those seeking practical assistance, those of a more mystical bent & every soul awaiting discovery." Toni Petrinovich, Ph.D.; author: The Call: Awakening the Angelic Human

The Tao of Spiritual Partnership

To download the first chapter, click here
To see the Table of Contents click here

Praise for The Tao of Spiritual Partnership

“All humans seek the illusive touch of another's Soul, which opens us to the sense of belonging to something bigger than the self. Dr. Kortsch has given us the true "tao" of relationship in this brilliant exploration of emotional tapestry. We will be grateful for this illumination of spiritual partnership for generations to come."
Chris Griscom: Spiritual Leader, Author (among others) of: Ecstasy is a New Frequency

“Eloquently and comprehensive, showing how your primary love relationship may be a sacred vessel that transports you and your partner to a place of mutual healing and expansion.” 
Robert Schwartz: Author of Your Soul’s Gift: The Healing Power of the Life You Planned Before You Were Born 


The Power of Your Heart: Loving the Self 

My new book: The Power of Your Heart: Loving the Self, is just out. Here is a brief excerpt from the Introduction:

It is your right to live a life of love. It is your right to understand that loving yourself first is not a selfish way of behavior, but one that allows you to live that life of love. However, it's highly probable that you never got the instruction manual explaining exactly how to accomplish this. Possibly your family - and it may have been a loving family - considered loving the self an act of selfishness. Or perhaps the members of your family simply didn't practice loving the self, and of course, what you didn't see - what was not shown to you - while you were growing up, meant that you just didn't learn how to apply it to yourself. The closer you are able to move towards loving yourself, the closer you will be to living a life of love - quite independently of whether you are in a love relationship or not. A life of love can be lived with or without a partnership, because a life of love implies that you know that it all begins with you by loving the self. The more clearly you understand how to love yourself, the more clearly you will see that it is very hard - if not impossible - to love others in ways that are unrelated to fulfilling any of your needs. Loving yourself first is - for so many of us - one of the hardest things we will ever learn how to do. But know this: the benefits affect you in every particle of your being - body, mind, and soul - and are greater than you will ever be able to imagine.

Those You Admire Show You So Much About Yourself

Give this some thought.

Who are the people that you most admire? Pick some that are mainly your own gender. Here are some areas to look at:

• close family
• teachers, mentors
• friends and colleagues
• public figures in politics
• business leaders
• professionals from any walk of life
• artists (authors, painters, sculptors, musicians, composers, singers, etc.)
• actors
• characters from history
• characters from literature
• characters from cinema

OK, you get the picture. Choose two or three that you truly admire for some specific qualities.

Now take a sheet of paper and under the name of each of these persons, write what it is that you admire about them (please: no physical characteristics...just qualities of character or behavior).
I assume you have written about some very wonderful people, even if they are unknown to all but you. The qualities you admire about them, are probably also very wonderful. Please stop reading if you have not already written out the qualities you admire. This is important. Only go on reading once that is done.

You may find that you have chosen several people whom you admire for very similar reasons, even though one of them might be someone you know personally, one a public figure, and one someone from a book you once read.

From the psychological point of view, and in Jungian terms the qualities you admire, that you have written down, say this about you: there are elements of your character that you have not yet recognized, that you don't yet accept as actually forming part of yourself. These are the elements that you admire in others of your own gender. The reason you have to admire them out there is because you have not yet recognized them in you.

Use this information to start paying more attention to any clue, however slight, in you that shows you that you do have these qualities in you in nascent form, and start bringing them to life, bit by bit, more and more every day.

Books by Dr. Gabriella Kortsch:

Rewiring the Soul

Click here to download the first chapter.

To see the Table of Contents click here

Reviews From the Back Cover:

"The masterwork of a profoundly gifted healer of the soul. Dazzling, challenging, wondrously useful." Peggy Rubin, Director, Center for Sacred Theatre, Ashland, Oregon; author: To Be and How To Be, Transforming Your Life Through Sacred Theatre

"Rewiring the Soul is one the best introductions to the spiritual life I've ever read. Not esoteric but real-world & practical. The implications are profound." Peter Shepherd; Founder Trans4mind.com; author: Daring To Be Yourself 

"The human being's directory to the soul. A breakthrough for those seeking practical assistance, those of a more mystical bent & every soul awaiting discovery." Toni Petrinovich, Ph.D.; author: The Call: Awakening the Angelic Human

The Tao of Spiritual Partnership

To download the first chapter, click here
To see the Table of Contents click here

Praise for The Tao of Spiritual Partnership

“All humans seek the illusive touch of another's Soul, which opens us to the sense of belonging to something bigger than the self. Dr. Kortsch has given us the true "tao" of relationship in this brilliant exploration of emotional tapestry. We will be grateful for this illumination of spiritual partnership for generations to come."
Chris Griscom: Spiritual Leader, Author (among others) of: Ecstasy is a New Frequency

“Eloquently and comprehensive, showing how your primary love relationship may be a sacred vessel that transports you and your partner to a place of mutual healing and expansion.” 
Robert Schwartz: Author of Your Soul’s Gift: The Healing Power of the Life You Planned Before You Were Born 


The Power of Your Heart: Loving the Self 

My new book: The Power of Your Heart: Loving the Self, is just out. Here is a brief excerpt from the Introduction:

It is your right to live a life of love. It is your right to understand that loving yourself first is not a selfish way of behavior, but one that allows you to live that life of love. However, it's highly probable that you never got the instruction manual explaining exactly how to accomplish this. Possibly your family - and it may have been a loving family - considered loving the self an act of selfishness. Or perhaps the members of your family simply didn't practice loving the self, and of course, what you didn't see - what was not shown to you - while you were growing up, meant that you just didn't learn how to apply it to yourself. The closer you are able to move towards loving yourself, the closer you will be to living a life of love - quite independently of whether you are in a love relationship or not. A life of love can be lived with or without a partnership, because a life of love implies that you know that it all begins with you by loving the self. The more clearly you understand how to love yourself, the more clearly you will see that it is very hard - if not impossible - to love others in ways that are unrelated to fulfilling any of your needs. Loving yourself first is - for so many of us - one of the hardest things we will ever learn how to do. But know this: the benefits affect you in every particle of your being - body, mind, and soul - and are greater than you will ever be able to imagine.

Choosing Freedom or Being a Victim

• It's just the way I am.
• My husband/boyfriend/partner always makes me so sad.
• My wife/girlfriend/partner always makes me so mad.
• When it rains I get so depressed.
• When they play "our" song on the radio, I feel so nostalgic.
• When my boss gets stressed he yells at me and I resent him so much for it.
• They cooked my steak too much, but I don't like to make a fuss, so I had to eat this really tough piece of meat for lunch and now I have indigestion.

My friend stood me up for dinner the other day because some guy she really likes asked her out in the last minute. I'm really happy for her, but I don't think it's right she left me high and dry with nothing to do on a Saturday evening.

Sound familiar? Recognize any of these tunes?

So if you have been reading some of the posts on this blog, you will have realized that in all of the above situations, no matter what the external event, you can choose to see yourself as a victim of circumstance, or you can choose to see other alternatives of action, thought, or feeling, and in so doing, choose freedom. It is freedom, because you no longer have a blind reaction to the external event, but deliberately choose how to react to a given situation.

Choosing to react from a number of different alternatives means you have a choice about the outcome inside of you, and you always have a choice.

See also the following articles from my website and posts from this blog regarding making choicess:

• my February 2006 Newsletter - Making Choices: Taking Responsibility For Our Lives
• my December 2006 Newsletter - Gratitude, Choice, and the "Why Did This Happen to Me?" Syndrome

Books by Dr. Gabriella Kortsch:

Rewiring the Soul

Click here to download the first chapter.

To see the Table of Contents click here

Reviews From the Back Cover:

"The masterwork of a profoundly gifted healer of the soul. Dazzling, challenging, wondrously useful." Peggy Rubin, Director, Center for Sacred Theatre, Ashland, Oregon; author: To Be and How To Be, Transforming Your Life Through Sacred Theatre

"Rewiring the Soul is one the best introductions to the spiritual life I've ever read. Not esoteric but real-world & practical. The implications are profound." Peter Shepherd; Founder Trans4mind.com; author: Daring To Be Yourself 

"The human being's directory to the soul. A breakthrough for those seeking practical assistance, those of a more mystical bent & every soul awaiting discovery." Toni Petrinovich, Ph.D.; author: The Call: Awakening the Angelic Human

The Tao of Spiritual Partnership

To download the first chapter, click here
To see the Table of Contents click here

Praise for The Tao of Spiritual Partnership

“All humans seek the illusive touch of another's Soul, which opens us to the sense of belonging to something bigger than the self. Dr. Kortsch has given us the true "tao" of relationship in this brilliant exploration of emotional tapestry. We will be grateful for this illumination of spiritual partnership for generations to come."
Chris Griscom: Spiritual Leader, Author (among others) of: Ecstasy is a New Frequency

“Eloquently and comprehensive, showing how your primary love relationship may be a sacred vessel that transports you and your partner to a place of mutual healing and expansion.” 
Robert Schwartz: Author of Your Soul’s Gift: The Healing Power of the Life You Planned Before You Were Born 


The Power of Your Heart: Loving the Self 

My new book: The Power of Your Heart: Loving the Self, is just out. Here is a brief excerpt from the Introduction:

It is your right to live a life of love. It is your right to understand that loving yourself first is not a selfish way of behavior, but one that allows you to live that life of love. However, it's highly probable that you never got the instruction manual explaining exactly how to accomplish this. Possibly your family - and it may have been a loving family - considered loving the self an act of selfishness. Or perhaps the members of your family simply didn't practice loving the self, and of course, what you didn't see - what was not shown to you - while you were growing up, meant that you just didn't learn how to apply it to yourself. The closer you are able to move towards loving yourself, the closer you will be to living a life of love - quite independently of whether you are in a love relationship or not. A life of love can be lived with or without a partnership, because a life of love implies that you know that it all begins with you by loving the self. The more clearly you understand how to love yourself, the more clearly you will see that it is very hard - if not impossible - to love others in ways that are unrelated to fulfilling any of your needs. Loving yourself first is - for so many of us - one of the hardest things we will ever learn how to do. But know this: the benefits affect you in every particle of your being - body, mind, and soul - and are greater than you will ever be able to imagine.

Remember To Laugh!

So much serious stuff all the time. Find a meaning in your life..seek inner growth...watch for your inner freedom...don't wallow in relationship pain...and on and on.

But all the time what is truly so very important is that we remember to laugh. And that doesn't just mean laugh as in hearing a funny joke, or as in watching a comedy, or laugh as in seeing a funny video of your relatives at a party, but laugh as in find the laughter inside of you, even when on the outside it doesn't look so great.

You've probably heard all the same stories the rest of us have, about Patch Adams (played by Robin Williams in the movie by the same name), the doctor who invented laughter therapy, and about Norman Cousins, the man who realized that he was able to temporarily alleviate his pain by watching comedies. These people have shown the world that illness and pain, depression and other ailments can be ameliorated by laughter.

Laugh therapy has begun to become quite prevalent the world over...private practices such as mine, group sessions, weekend retreats, etc., have sprung up ubiquitously in order to show people the benefits of laughter.

Blood flow, immune response, blood sugar levels, all appear to improve with laughter. While the jury is still out on a definitive answer, it does appear that we should not ignore the potential of laughter in our lives, not to mention how good it makes you feel to have a belly laugh.

So back to the inner laughter. The laughter that we should work on finding despite outer worries, concerns, and pain or disappointment. Use your emotions as a barometer (see my article about this subject) in order to raise your energy. Use your emotions to help you realize when you need to find your inner laughter. Begin to practice this on a daily basis in order to bring your life to other levels of joy and satisfaction. Your inner laughter is not only capable of keeping you healthy, but also capable of keeping you in a place of much greater and more constant joy than the way you possibly live now.

Books by Dr. Gabriella Kortsch:

Rewiring the Soul

Click here to download the first chapter.

To see the Table of Contents click here

Reviews From the Back Cover:

"The masterwork of a profoundly gifted healer of the soul. Dazzling, challenging, wondrously useful." Peggy Rubin, Director, Center for Sacred Theatre, Ashland, Oregon; author: To Be and How To Be, Transforming Your Life Through Sacred Theatre

"Rewiring the Soul is one the best introductions to the spiritual life I've ever read. Not esoteric but real-world & practical. The implications are profound." Peter Shepherd; Founder Trans4mind.com; author: Daring To Be Yourself 

"The human being's directory to the soul. A breakthrough for those seeking practical assistance, those of a more mystical bent & every soul awaiting discovery." Toni Petrinovich, Ph.D.; author: The Call: Awakening the Angelic Human

The Tao of Spiritual Partnership

To download the first chapter, click here
To see the Table of Contents click here

Praise for The Tao of Spiritual Partnership

“All humans seek the illusive touch of another's Soul, which opens us to the sense of belonging to something bigger than the self. Dr. Kortsch has given us the true "tao" of relationship in this brilliant exploration of emotional tapestry. We will be grateful for this illumination of spiritual partnership for generations to come."
Chris Griscom: Spiritual Leader, Author (among others) of: Ecstasy is a New Frequency

“Eloquently and comprehensive, showing how your primary love relationship may be a sacred vessel that transports you and your partner to a place of mutual healing and expansion.” 
Robert Schwartz: Author of Your Soul’s Gift: The Healing Power of the Life You Planned Before You Were Born 


The Power of Your Heart: Loving the Self 

My new book: The Power of Your Heart: Loving the Self, is just out. Here is a brief excerpt from the Introduction:

It is your right to live a life of love. It is your right to understand that loving yourself first is not a selfish way of behavior, but one that allows you to live that life of love. However, it's highly probable that you never got the instruction manual explaining exactly how to accomplish this. Possibly your family - and it may have been a loving family - considered loving the self an act of selfishness. Or perhaps the members of your family simply didn't practice loving the self, and of course, what you didn't see - what was not shown to you - while you were growing up, meant that you just didn't learn how to apply it to yourself. The closer you are able to move towards loving yourself, the closer you will be to living a life of love - quite independently of whether you are in a love relationship or not. A life of love can be lived with or without a partnership, because a life of love implies that you know that it all begins with you by loving the self. The more clearly you understand how to love yourself, the more clearly you will see that it is very hard - if not impossible - to love others in ways that are unrelated to fulfilling any of your needs. Loving yourself first is - for so many of us - one of the hardest things we will ever learn how to do. But know this: the benefits affect you in every particle of your being - body, mind, and soul - and are greater than you will ever be able to imagine.

Expressing All Your Emotions

If you’ve been keeping up with my posts, it may sound as though I am suggesting that you focus only on feeling good, on keeping your energetic vibration or frequency high, and that you ignore or forget about your other, less agreeable emotions.

In fact, nothing could be further from the truth.

Your emotions need careful looking at, careful calibration, and certainly, should not be ignored. If you are angry, this needs to be expressed. If you are sad, or grieving, again, this needs to be expressed. If you are feeling any kind of emotion, an avenue for its expression needs to be found.

But…the expression of your emotion needs to be a healthy one.

So if you are angry, yelling, fighting, or insulting won’t cut it. A healthy expression might be something along the lines of maintaining healthy boundaries, where you could choose to say to the person who has angered you: that is not acceptable to me. Or: your lack of respect (or consideration) for me is not acceptable. Or: I feel that you have not listened to me, not understood me, and I feel that you are totally ignoring my opinions about this matter. This makes me feel insulted (or hurt, or angry, or sad, etc.).

The point being, that as you express your emotions in this way, rather than by fighting, or arguing, or playing the one-upmanship game, you are showing yourself respect for yourself, and thus gain a sense of empowerment.
If the emotions you are feeling are grief or sadness, these must also be expressed. If someone you love is ill, or if you have lost someone you love, or if you have had a loss of another kind, you clearly can not gloss over this, and try to make yourself feel good. You must go through the process of the loss, or the pain. Nevertheless, the healthy personality will find – even in a situation of this nature – something positive to take from it, something to learn from it, something with which inner growth can take place, leading to ever greater inner freedom.

Here is where renowned thinkers or world leaders such as Viktor Frankl (Man's Search For Meaning), or Nelson Mandela (his autobiography), or Alexandr Solzhenitsyn (One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich) can help open your eyes a great deal.

One caveat: if you feel a need to express your negative emotions in such a way so that you can blame another for your feelings or for whatever it is that is happening to you, there is probably something else at work, than “just” your difficult emotions. In all likelihood there is an underlying issue…just the fact that you want to blame can clue you in on that…because no matter what the other has done, you are the one who chooses how to act and react, and you are the one who is responsible for how you feel (yes, you are!) and therein lies your choice for bondage or freedom.

Books by Dr. Gabriella Kortsch:

Rewiring the Soul

Click here to download the first chapter.

To see the Table of Contents click here

Reviews From the Back Cover:

"The masterwork of a profoundly gifted healer of the soul. Dazzling, challenging, wondrously useful." Peggy Rubin, Director, Center for Sacred Theatre, Ashland, Oregon; author: To Be and How To Be, Transforming Your Life Through Sacred Theatre

"Rewiring the Soul is one the best introductions to the spiritual life I've ever read. Not esoteric but real-world & practical. The implications are profound." Peter Shepherd; Founder Trans4mind.com; author: Daring To Be Yourself 

"The human being's directory to the soul. A breakthrough for those seeking practical assistance, those of a more mystical bent & every soul awaiting discovery." Toni Petrinovich, Ph.D.; author: The Call: Awakening the Angelic Human

The Tao of Spiritual Partnership

To download the first chapter, click here
To see the Table of Contents click here

Praise for The Tao of Spiritual Partnership

“All humans seek the illusive touch of another's Soul, which opens us to the sense of belonging to something bigger than the self. Dr. Kortsch has given us the true "tao" of relationship in this brilliant exploration of emotional tapestry. We will be grateful for this illumination of spiritual partnership for generations to come."
Chris Griscom: Spiritual Leader, Author (among others) of: Ecstasy is a New Frequency

“Eloquently and comprehensive, showing how your primary love relationship may be a sacred vessel that transports you and your partner to a place of mutual healing and expansion.” 
Robert Schwartz: Author of Your Soul’s Gift: The Healing Power of the Life You Planned Before You Were Born 


The Power of Your Heart: Loving the Self 

My new book: The Power of Your Heart: Loving the Self, is just out. Here is a brief excerpt from the Introduction:

It is your right to live a life of love. It is your right to understand that loving yourself first is not a selfish way of behavior, but one that allows you to live that life of love. However, it's highly probable that you never got the instruction manual explaining exactly how to accomplish this. Possibly your family - and it may have been a loving family - considered loving the self an act of selfishness. Or perhaps the members of your family simply didn't practice loving the self, and of course, what you didn't see - what was not shown to you - while you were growing up, meant that you just didn't learn how to apply it to yourself. The closer you are able to move towards loving yourself, the closer you will be to living a life of love - quite independently of whether you are in a love relationship or not. A life of love can be lived with or without a partnership, because a life of love implies that you know that it all begins with you by loving the self. The more clearly you understand how to love yourself, the more clearly you will see that it is very hard - if not impossible - to love others in ways that are unrelated to fulfilling any of your needs. Loving yourself first is - for so many of us - one of the hardest things we will ever learn how to do. But know this: the benefits affect you in every particle of your being - body, mind, and soul - and are greater than you will ever be able to imagine.

And If I WANT To Stay Angry???

So you've been reading these posts and by now you know some techniques to use to keep yourself in a good place, or to bring yourself back up to a good place...and you're sitting in your car, and an idiot almost causes you to have an accident.

And while you're still trying to keep your cool about that, he races down the road behind you, practically kissing your tail end with his front bumper, and you notice you are close to losing it.

I mean, you have a right, right?

So then you think about what you've been reading here...and you tell yourself: "No way am I going to get my mind away from this now to feel better about it - I NEED to feel this anger and frustration; I WANT to feel it. The last thing I want to do right now is get away from this place in my mind, because I LIKE this feeling...at least for a bit".

This is actually simply another type of challenge you get presented with. Life is so great (at this point you may not want to agree). All these challenges bascially all serve the same purpose: your inner growth which leads to your inner freedom.

But, there you are on the road, raging inside, and the last thing you want to do is bring yourself away from the feeling. You are wallowing in it. Eckhart Tolle talks about the pain body as being the place - the painful place we go to, despite the pain, because we are so familiar with it. It's almost comforting in its painful familiarity. Kind of the way kids will cry themselves to sleep to comfort themselves.

So this angry place from which you just don't want to come away, is a version of that. All I'm suggesting is that you give this some consideration next time it happens and think about this. Maybe the pull will be less strong. Maybe you'll want to stay there less time. Maybe you'll decide to leave as soon as you realize what is happening. That's where freedom starts.

Books by Dr. Gabriella Kortsch:

Rewiring the Soul

Click here to download the first chapter.

To see the Table of Contents click here

Reviews From the Back Cover:

"The masterwork of a profoundly gifted healer of the soul. Dazzling, challenging, wondrously useful." Peggy Rubin, Director, Center for Sacred Theatre, Ashland, Oregon; author: To Be and How To Be, Transforming Your Life Through Sacred Theatre

"Rewiring the Soul is one the best introductions to the spiritual life I've ever read. Not esoteric but real-world & practical. The implications are profound." Peter Shepherd; Founder Trans4mind.com; author: Daring To Be Yourself 

"The human being's directory to the soul. A breakthrough for those seeking practical assistance, those of a more mystical bent & every soul awaiting discovery." Toni Petrinovich, Ph.D.; author: The Call: Awakening the Angelic Human

The Tao of Spiritual Partnership

To download the first chapter, click here
To see the Table of Contents click here

Praise for The Tao of Spiritual Partnership

“All humans seek the illusive touch of another's Soul, which opens us to the sense of belonging to something bigger than the self. Dr. Kortsch has given us the true "tao" of relationship in this brilliant exploration of emotional tapestry. We will be grateful for this illumination of spiritual partnership for generations to come."
Chris Griscom: Spiritual Leader, Author (among others) of: Ecstasy is a New Frequency

“Eloquently and comprehensive, showing how your primary love relationship may be a sacred vessel that transports you and your partner to a place of mutual healing and expansion.” 
Robert Schwartz: Author of Your Soul’s Gift: The Healing Power of the Life You Planned Before You Were Born 


The Power of Your Heart: Loving the Self 

My new book: The Power of Your Heart: Loving the Self, is just out. Here is a brief excerpt from the Introduction:

It is your right to live a life of love. It is your right to understand that loving yourself first is not a selfish way of behavior, but one that allows you to live that life of love. However, it's highly probable that you never got the instruction manual explaining exactly how to accomplish this. Possibly your family - and it may have been a loving family - considered loving the self an act of selfishness. Or perhaps the members of your family simply didn't practice loving the self, and of course, what you didn't see - what was not shown to you - while you were growing up, meant that you just didn't learn how to apply it to yourself. The closer you are able to move towards loving yourself, the closer you will be to living a life of love - quite independently of whether you are in a love relationship or not. A life of love can be lived with or without a partnership, because a life of love implies that you know that it all begins with you by loving the self. The more clearly you understand how to love yourself, the more clearly you will see that it is very hard - if not impossible - to love others in ways that are unrelated to fulfilling any of your needs. Loving yourself first is - for so many of us - one of the hardest things we will ever learn how to do. But know this: the benefits affect you in every particle of your being - body, mind, and soul - and are greater than you will ever be able to imagine.