The Power of Your Heart: Loving the Self / Gabriella Kortsch, PhD: Rewiring the Soul

Showing posts with label Rewiring the Soul. Show all posts

Thursday, September 5, 2013

The Unexamined Life

It was Socrates who in 399 BCE said the unexamined life is not worth living.

Most of us live unexamined lives. Why? Because that is how our world - generally speaking - is. We may examine our outer circumstances: our profession, our homes, our standing in society, our finances, etc., but we tend not to examine our inner lives.

History - world history - has shown us that there are certain cycles that repeat with some regularity, and that we can learn from in order to avoid mistakes of the past, and potentiate other, stronger, and more positive aspects.

Interestingly, humanistic astrology also focuses on cycles in the human life span, and uses, for example, the planet Saturn to determine when those cycles take place in the life of an individual. Once determined, and especially if the individual is no longer a young person, by virtue of past cycles, the current and future cycles can be much better understood (not predicted...this is not about fortune telling, but about understanding). However, even with these tools, past cycles can only be understood if the individual has made an effort at examining the events - inner and outer - of his or her life.

Economic and business cycles also study the fluctuations of the market and the changes in any given economy or society.

Therefore, it would seem that examining one's life is also truly important, if one has any interest whatsoever in understanding it and oneself.

Examining one's own life is not tremendously difficult, but it does pose some awkwardness for those not versed in this kind of activity, as it involves time with oneself. I have found that for some people journaling is a good activity, as it allows them to bring out inner feelings and thoughts that they may not be so very much aware of in ordinary everyday life. More than journaling, however, I also recommend that a sheet of paper be taken for every year of the life. Then, simply write down those things that you know: residence, which family members (and pets) lived with you, school, friends, etc., progressing to further education, jobs, partners, cities of residence, and so on. As you fill in obvious bits, you begin to remember others. Jot them down in bullet fashion, in order to flesh out your own forgotten and unexamined life. This is the beginning to greater understanding. You may see how decisions you took at age 22 led you to expansion and growth at age 29, that in turn led you to other avenues at 36. Or you may see the reverse. You may notice that whenever you had one type of calamity, your reactions were of a given type, that led, some time in the future, to another version of the same calamity. Now you are in the middle of facing another one. Perhaps - due to this examination of your life - you may now decide to react differently.

However you do it, examining the life is always of great value. You may even find it fascinating!

Also read my May 2007 Newsletter: Tending Your Inner Garden.

Books by Dr. Gabriella Kortsch:

Rewiring the Soul

Click here to download the first chapter.

To see the Table of Contents click here

Reviews From the Back Cover:

"The masterwork of a profoundly gifted healer of the soul. Dazzling, challenging, wondrously useful." Peggy Rubin, Director, Center for Sacred Theatre, Ashland, Oregon; author: To Be and How To Be, Transforming Your Life Through Sacred Theatre

"Rewiring the Soul is one the best introductions to the spiritual life I've ever read. Not esoteric but real-world & practical. The implications are profound." Peter Shepherd; Founder Trans4mind.com; author: Daring To Be Yourself

"The human being's directory to the soul. A breakthrough for those seeking practical assistance, those of a more mystical bent & every soul awaiting discovery." Toni Petrinovich, Ph.D.; author: The Call: Awakening the Angelic Human

The Tao of Spiritual Partnership

To download the first chapter, click here
To see the Table of Contents click here

Praise for The Tao of Spiritual Partnership

“All humans seek the illusive touch of another's Soul, which opens us to the sense of belonging to something bigger than the self. Dr. Kortsch has given us the true "tao" of relationship in this brilliant exploration of emotional tapestry. We will be grateful for this illumination of spiritual partnership for generations to come."
Chris Griscom: Spiritual Leader, Author (among others) of: Ecstasy is a New Frequency

“Eloquently and comprehensive, showing how your primary love relationship may be a sacred vessel that transports you and your partner to a place of mutual healing and expansion.”
Robert Schwartz: Author of Your Soul’s Gift: The Healing Power of the Life You Planned Before You Were Born

The Power of Your Heart: Loving the Self

My new book: The Power of Your Heart: Loving the Self, is just out. Here is a brief excerpt from the Introduction:

It is your right to live a life of love. It is your right to understand that loving yourself first is not a selfish way of behavior, but one that allows you to live that life of love. However, it's highly probable that you never got the instruction manual explaining exactly how to accomplish this. Possibly your family - and it may have been a loving family - considered loving the self an act of selfishness. Or perhaps the members of your family simply didn't practice loving the self, and of course, what you didn't see - what was not shown to you - while you were growing up, meant that you just didn't learn how to apply it to yourself. The closer you are able to move towards loving yourself, the closer you will be to living a life of love - quite independently of whether you are in a love relationship or not. A life of love can be lived with or without a partnership, because a life of love implies that you know that it all begins with you by loving the self. The more clearly you understand how to love yourself, the more clearly you will see that it is very hard - if not impossible - to love others in ways that are unrelated to fulfilling any of your needs. Loving yourself first is - for so many of us - one of the hardest things we will ever learn how to do. But know this: the benefits affect you in every particle of your being - body, mind, and soul - and are greater than you will ever be able to imagine.

Thursday, August 29, 2013

Judging Others ... Judging Yourself

Have you ever noticed how many people are inconsiderate? How often others just don't seem to be aware of anyone but themselves?

How about the people that think they are worth more than others because their bank account is bigger? Or those that think their opinion is better than others' because they are well-known celebrities, politicians, public figures, or hold a post of some weight?

And have you seen any of those that believe there is something special about them because they frequent a lot of social events, or because they eat at certain exclusive restaurants, or stay at up-market hotels?

What about the person who drinks too much and creates havoc on public roads? Or causes uncomfortable situations in a family's holiday reunion? The list could go on and on.

Judging other people for any of the above and many other things, is a curious phenomenon. As we judge others we are actually judging ourselves. What I mean by that is that if we feel we must judge, we automatically place ourselves in a position of "better" in some way than the other person. Examine that for a moment. Better? Better?

It may be true that others do whatever they do, but where do we come, what place in ourselves to we come from with these judgements?

Much negativity is associated with judging others, beginning with that essence of feeling somehow better or more worthy, or holier, or less materialistic, or more law-abiding, or less vain, etc. than another. So in this comparison of ourselves and the other, we lose any possibility of connection with the other. If we lose that, we lose the most precious aspect of our time here: that of discovering our connection to all of humanity.

Going back to judgement - here is a suggestion: when you find yourself judging, and if you would like to do so less, or stop it all together, simply send the other person peace or love in your mind, and let it go. Let whatever it was that you had been judging leave your mind. You will find that your life becomes both much more simple, and much, much richer. Try it, even if only for a couple of weeks to observe its effect on you.

Books by Dr. Gabriella Kortsch:

Rewiring the Soul

Click here to download the first chapter.

My new book: The Power of Your Heart: Loving the Self, is just out. Here is a brief excerpt from the Introduction:

Thursday, August 22, 2013

Our Connection to Others

Listening to a Wayne Dyer talk recently, I was reminded of a book by Carl Gustav Jung that I read for the first time in my 20's, called Modern Man in Search of a Soul. Books such as this one give continually greater meaning on subsequent readings, because of the changes in yourself that allow you to understand the author's intent on other - higher - levels.

The concept of cycles or ever-higher spiraling stages in a lifetime has been examined by many disciplines, and is well worth a look.

In his book, Jung refers to different archetypes, or times in our lives, which Dyer paraphrases as follows (and there is a connection, of course, to Abraham Maslow's concept of hierarchy of needs here as well):

Athlete: our primary emphasis is on our body, what it can do, how strong it is, how good it looks
Warrior: at this time in our adult life we try to conquer, defeat, collect, win, set goals, get as much as we possibly can, our primary emphasis is on getting ahead, on accumulating, on achieving some sense of security
Statesman: now we no longer ask what's in it for me, but instead, shift to how may I serve? because that simply becomes more important for us...the emphasis is no longer on the I, but rather, on the you. (Note: this generally does not work well, until the person has a healthy love relationship and connection with him or herself...see also my May 2007 Newsletter: Tending Your Inner Garden)
Spirit: we begin to understand that this is not our home, and that these are not our bodies, and that none of this is real.

In the understanding of this, you begin to see yourself as the witness to your life, and you can let go of the ego (the part of you that says I am what I have, what I do, and what others think of me. It also says I am separate from you, rather than connected to you and that what I have is separate from you...there is a great deal of interesting material about the ego in A Course in Miracles).

Letting go of the ego offers enormous inner freedom, it offers a real possibility of living in the now (see also Eckhart Tolle's The Power of Now), and finally, it offers the possibility of allowing us to see that we are truly all one, and that we are all connected. This higher consciousness, or mystical awareness allows you to see the connection that is there among all of us.

Click here for others posts on our connectedness.

Books by Dr. Gabriella Kortsch:

Rewiring the Soul

Click here to download the first chapter.

My new book: The Power of Your Heart: Loving the Self, is just out. Here is a brief excerpt from the Introduction:

Wednesday, August 7, 2013

The Life Not Lived

Oscar Wilde said: One's real life is often the life that one does not lead.

Why would that be one's real life? Think for a moment how frequently you get side-tracked by what others think. You have a plan or a desire or an idea, and then, because of censure you feel you might receive from others or because someone says something to you that is critical or derisory about what you are planning, you set your own ideas aside.

They have been annihilated. And you can't really blame the other person - they merely stated their opinion. The problem is that you listened, and let it affect you to the point that you buried your own thoughts and are now living life -at least in this respect - according to what the other person has said...and where is your own life?

See also my March 2006 newsletter: Intentional Focus: Your Happiness, Your Success, and the Law of Attraction and my August 2007 newsletter: Making Fear of the Unknown Work for You.

Image: Atlas Mountains

Books by Dr. Gabriella Kortsch:

Rewiring the Soul

Click here to download the first chapter.

My new book: The Power of Your Heart: Loving the Self, is just out. Here is a brief excerpt from the Introduction:

Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Those You Admire Show You So Much About Yourself

Give this some thought.

Who are the people that you most admire? Pick some that are mainly your own gender. Here are some areas to look at:

close family
teachers, mentors
friends and colleagues
public figures in politics
business leaders
professionals from any walk of life
artists (authors, painters, sculptors, musicians, composers, singers, etc.)
actors
characters from history
characters from literature
characters from cinema

OK, you get the picture. Choose two or three that you truly admire for some specific qualities.

Now take a sheet of paper and under the name of each of these persons, write what it is that you admire about them (please: no physical characteristics...just qualities of character or behavior).
I assume you have written about some very wonderful people, even if they are unknown to all but you. The qualities you admire about them, are probably also very wonderful. Please stop reading if you have not already written out the qualities you admire. This is important. Only go on reading once that is done.

You may find that you have chosen several people whom you admire for very similar reasons, even though one of them might be someone you know personally, one a public figure, and one someone from a book you once read.

From the psychological point of view, and in Jungian terms the qualities you admire, that you have written down, say this about you: there are elements of your character that you have not yet recognized, that you don't yet accept as actually forming part of yourself. These are the elements that you admire in others of your own gender. The reason you have to admire them out there is because you have not yet recognized them in you.

Use this information to start paying more attention to any clue, however slight, in you that shows you that you do have these qualities in you in nascent form, and start bringing them to life, bit by bit, more and more every day.

Books by Dr. Gabriella Kortsch:

Rewiring the Soul

Click here to download the first chapter.

My new book: The Power of Your Heart: Loving the Self, is just out. Here is a brief excerpt from the Introduction:

Monday, July 22, 2013

Refuse to Let Them Take Your Dream From You

Recently I gave a talk about the topic of life dreams - those dreams that you have about how you would like something (whatever) to be in your life at some point, and about not letting others take your dream from you.

Dreams of this type are so infinitely important to the quality of our lives...whether we become aware of them when we are 12, or whether we do so when we are 60, or whether we dust them off at any stage of our lives, remembering how blissfully we used to dream about fulfilling those dreams, and then just forgot about them. So now, for whatever reason, we are at another point in our lives, and have the opportunity to revisit those dreams, and to do something concrete about accomplishing them. What a blast!

Dreams should not be ignored, and particularly, you should never let anyone talk you out of your dreams.

Due to the response I received after the talk, I would just like to reiterate some of the points made in the show:

1. What your dream is:

something that gives meaning to your life
something that gives you a buzz, a sense of excitement, high energy, butterflies (of the good kind) in your solar plexus
something that tells you - as opposed to so many others - that you actually already know what you want, so you are blessed!

2. What your dream is not:

something crazy
something childish
something that you should ignore
something that will lead you to failure

3. What others may say to you about your dream:

it's totally unrealistic
it will never work
it's childish
it's crazy
it's too hard
don't you realize that something so easy could never be of any value?
it's too risky
no one else has ever done it before
no one will like it
no one will want it
no one will believe it
no one will accept it
it's a sure road to failure
it's nonsense
it's not serious
it's not what a grown man (woman) should do
it's ridiculous
do you realize what people will say about you if you do that?
why do you think you might succeed where so many others have tried and failed?

Realize that the same buzz", the same special energy you feel whenever you think about whatever it is that your dream is all about, is something so special, something so important, that this very feeling is what can most move you in the direction of your goals, your dream, but only if you hold on to that feeling, that energy.

Even when your dreams change direction slightly, you will know you are on the right track, as long as you continue to have the feeling, the buzz, the energy. It's a direct inner connection to your inner self, that voice inside of you that warns you just before a car comes racing around the corner at the second you were about to step out into its path, that voice (or feeling) inside of you that warns you about that person you just met at the dinner party, who at first glance seems so wonderful, just what you were looking for, and yet, there may be something you need to look at more closely, and thanks to listening to that voice, you do so, before jumping off the precipice, and you find out why your inner voice communicated with you. Call it intuition, call it buzz, call it energy, there is a spark that we feel when that inner communication comes out and speaks to us.

If you feel this, if you are familiar with this, then it is paramount that you hang on to it. Don't think that just because others aren't doing it, or aren't paying conscious attention to it, that it isn't real. Count yourself very lucky - blessed - to have it in your life in such a clear way. You've connected to your inner source, in this case, your passion, and that is something you should welcome and nourish. As Wayne Dyer put it: Don't die with your music still inside you.

Books by Dr. Gabriella Kortsch:

Rewiring the Soul

Click here to download the first chapter.

My new book: The Power of Your Heart: Loving the Self, is just out. Here is a brief excerpt from the Introduction:

Thursday, July 18, 2013

The Thoughts You Reject

There's a wonderful quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson that goes like this:

In every work of genius, we recognize our own rejected thoughts; they come back to us with a certain alienated majesty.

How often have you not thought of something, maybe just as a fleeting thought or intuition that you paid little attention to, telling yourself that it was nonsense, or that it would never work, that the reisk was too high, or that you would, in all likelihood fail, or that if you were the one to think of it, it meant that it was not important, otherwise someone would have already done something like that, and so on?

In other words, you've had thoughts that for one reason or another you rejected ... and then, sometime later, perhaps only days, or perhaps decades, you see that someone else not only had the same thought, but they acted upon that thought, and did something about it, and the results of that thought were now something tangible or plausible that others could see, or touch, or hear, or smell, or in some way become aware of.

What happens at that moment; that moment of your own realization that your thought - your rejected thought - has been made reality by someone else, who, rather than rejecting it, took it, used it, made something of it?

Isn't that painful? Doesn't it make you feel all manner of negative things about yourself? Now you might even have to make up excuses for yourself for not undertaking action when you first had the thought. That's kind of like cheating at solitaire ... the only one who is betrayed is yourself.

So what can you really do when you stumble across one of your rejected thoughts made reality by someone else the next time? You can learn from it. Learn that your thoughts and intuitions come from a well-spring of creativity inside of you that you should not necessarily reject, that you might want to pay greater attention to. Learn that there may be great value in what you are rejecting and condemning to failure or brushing off as the silly meanderings of wandering mind. Give greater value to your inner inclinations and indications. Try them out. Then, instead of betraying yourself, you may find that you bring something to life that in fact gives you greater life.

Books by Dr. Gabriella Kortsch:

Rewiring the Soul

Click here to download the first chapter.

My new book: The Power of Your Heart: Loving the Self, is just out. Here is a brief excerpt from the Introduction:

Monday, July 15, 2013

Do You Remember to Laugh?

An apple a day...keeps the doctor away. How about a belly laugh a day makes life wonderful? Do you even remember the last time you had yourself a real belly laugh? The kind that made the muscles around your stomach ache? The kind that brought tears to your eyes? The kind that had you whooping? Maybe even snorting?

I find that many of the belly laughs I have are actually directed at myself or at something I have done or thought or said. I used to tell the story of a trip I took to Rio de Janeiro in the 90's. My hotel was perpendicular to Copacabana Beach, and from the balcony of my room you could indeed see the beach, so I was out there right after arriving from the airport, taking photos, and breathing in Rio.

As I looked around, I realized that the building across the street from the hotel was an apartment building, and that there was a man in shorts out on his own balcony, looking at me, and kind of making signs. I guess he thought perhaps I found his belly attractive...

I looked at him scornfully and studiously ignored him as I took more photos. He kept on making signs, but he didn't seem to understand that I just wasn't interested. Not even to smile, or wave, or acknowledge his presence.

This continued for four or five minutes, and he finally appeared to tire of my lack of interest, and so went back into the interior of his apartment. I, on the other hand, supremely superior to this mere mortal's fruitless signalling, slowly finished taking my photos and turned to go back into my hotel room through the French doors.

They had locked. From the inside. I could no longer get into my room. I was on the sixth floor of the hotel on a noisy street. I looked around, but realized, no matter how loudly I might shout, I would never be heard by anyone down on the street. I looked longingly into my room at the phone on the bedside table.

I gritted my teeth. I had no choice but to throw myself on the mercy of Mr. Big Belly whom I had been ignoring.

I looked across the street to his balcony. He wasn't there. I continued looking at it fixedly. He was my only hope. I had to get back to my room. I had appointments, needed to shower, change, and get going. If he didn't rescue me, I might be out there until the maid came the next morning to clean the room.

I looked across again. He still wasn't there. What would I do if he decided to exact revenge on my petty behavior? There he was! He had just come out. I jumped up and down. I waved. I felt like an absolute idiot. I had to get his attention. Finally he saw me. I gestured. I pleaded forgiveness with my hands. I mimed opening my door, and not getting in. I mimed a phone call, gesturing at him and down to the entrance of my hotel on the street level.

He nodded. He went into his apartment. He came back out after an eon. He made a V for victory. I thanked him with my hands. And several minutes later the Housekeeper came into my room and opened the balcony door to let me in.

I waved at the man in the shorts across the street and blew him a kiss.

I've gotten a lot of mileage from this story. Most of the time when I tell it, I laugh so much at myself and my arrogance that day, that whoever is listening to it, laughs with me.

Your belly laughs don't have to all be directed at you, but try and have one every day. It's great for your immune system, your blood pressure, your looks, your state of mind, it gives your body a great massage, and according to laughter therapists, it's just about one of the best things you can do for yourself.

Books by Dr. Gabriella Kortsch:

Rewiring the Soul

Click here to download the first chapter.

My new book: The Power of Your Heart: Loving the Self, is just out. Here is a brief excerpt from the Introduction:

Pages

Thursday, September 5, 2013

Thursday, August 29, 2013

Thursday, August 22, 2013

Wednesday, August 7, 2013

Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Monday, July 22, 2013

Thursday, July 18, 2013

Monday, July 15, 2013